Lesson 97

To sponsor a lesson send a message to the following


Lesson #97

Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.


Telling a father
about his son’s quarrel


  1. The other day I saw a boy fighting with my neighbor’s son,. 
    Would it be considered rechilus if I told my neighbor that his son was
    beaten up by this boy?
  1. Yes it would be.  As a matter of fact, telling your
    neighbor can cause great harm.  Your neighbor, upon hearing what was done
    to his son, might confront the other boy and strike him out of anger.  As
    a result, the father of the other boy would naturally get into a major
    dispute with your neighbor.  All of this, as a result of your rechilus.  If
    we would try to enumerate all the sins that can come out of such rechilus,
    they would be too many to count.


  1. If I know that the other kid started the fight for no good
    reason, would I be allowed to tell my neighbor?
  1. You should still not tell your neighbor unless very
    specific conditions are met.  We will discuss these conditions in future
    lessons, G-d willing.


This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh.   Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech.  The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.

Oded:  The concept of Supporting Torah scholars includes
marrying your daughter to one.

Menaseh:  Do you have source for that?

Oded:  Sure!  The Gemora in Meseches Kesubos says
that the Torah considers one who marries his daughter to a Torah scholar as if
he has clung to the Divine Presence.  The Gemora in Meseches Pesachim states: A
person should sell all that he owns so that he may marry the daughter of a
Torah scholar or marry his daughter to a Torah scholar.

Menaseh:  I think sometimes people are hesitant to do
so because they are worried about their daughters’ future.  Let’s face it,
someone who is learning all day is not going to be as financially stable as a
person who works for a living.

Oded:  Those are the words of a person’s evil
inclination.  Don’t we firmly believe that Hashem is the provider for all his
creations?  Is it logical to assume that Hashem will hold back sustenance from
someone who wants to learn his Torah and keep his mitzvos?

Menaseh:  When you look at it from that perspective
what you’re saying makes sense.

Oded:  It doesn’t surprise me that people who were
never exposed to the beauty of Torah are not seeking to connect with Torah
scholars.  However, the fact that this attitude is prevalent even among those
who were exposed to the beauty of Torah is surprising.

If you have any
questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman by
hitting the reply button.


If you know others
who would appreciate this program, please encourage them to join.  The more
people participating, the greater the zechus!  In addition, you will have a
share in the merit of anyone who improves their speech as a result of you
signing them onto this program!!

Click here to join.



1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 7 Par.

2) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 7 Par. 1


Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Sha’ar HaTorah Chap. 5

Latest Lessons