Lesson 79c Rechilus when hatred already exists – When commanded by parent
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Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.
hatred already exists
- I have a friend who already hates his boss. If I tell my
friend what his boss said about him, is that considered rechilus?
- Yes. Anything that will increase hatred, even if hatred
already exists, is still considered rechilus. If one creates hatred
between 2 people who hither-to were friends, it is an even greater sin. He
is called a Rasha and is despised before Hashem.
commanded by a parent
- If my father pressures me to tell him something that I
know would be rechilus, am I obligated to obey my father?
- Absolutely not. It is forbidden to obey your father if he
commands you to do something that is forbidden by the Torah or by the
sages. The same is true if your Rebbi commanded you to do something that
This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh. Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech. The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.
Oded: The posuk tells us that Yaakov loved Yosef
more than all his other sons because Yosef was a ben zekunim, a son of his old
Menaseh: Why is the posuk telling us this? What’s
the difference why Yaakov loved Yosef more than his brothers?
Oded: The Torah is informing us that Yaakov didn’t
accept the loshon horah told by Yosef. The only reason Yaakov loved Yosef more
was because he was a ben zekunim not because he accepted anything negative
about his brothers.
Menaseh: The Torah seems to go into a lengthy
discussion about Yosef’s dreams, why is that?
Oded: To somewhat justify the brothers feelings of
hatred towards Yosef.
Menaseh: How does it justify their feelings of
hatred? They wanted to kill Yosef!
Oded: They understood from Yosef’s dreams that Yosef
wanted to rule over them. That was also their understanding of why Yosef was
delivering bad reports about them to Yaakov; all to cause Yaakov to evict them.
Menaseh: They were concerned to the extent that they
were willing to consider killing him?
Oded: They had a certain level of evidence from the
fact that Yaakov gave Yosef the Kesones Passim, the special tunic. They read
into that that Yaakov accepted the loshon horah that Yosef told about them.
Menaseh: What were they worried that Yaakov would
Oded: They were very concerned that Yaakov would
make them subservient to Yosef; similar to what Yitzchak did to Eisav, making
him subservient to Yaakov. Or even worse, Yaakov could have removed them
completely by making them lowly slaves to Yosef; similar to what Noach did to
Cham, making him a slave of slaves to his brothers.
Menaseh: That does explain a lot. Because it always
bothered me how such righteous people would even consider taking such drastic
action against their own brother.
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1 Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 1 Par. 4
2 Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 1 Par. 5
Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Section 2 Chap.11