Lesson 5c Loshon horah in front of 3 or more
Note: We are now beginning our third cycle. The
Halacha section will primarily be a review of the lessons from the previous
cycles while the Aggadah section will be new material. Please bear in mind
that the purpose of learning the laws of Shmiras haloshon is not only to know
the laws but also to keep them on the fore of our minds. Therefore, even if
the material sounds familiar, to those who have been with us from the
beginning, it is still important to review so that we will remain cognizant of
these crucial laws at all times. Only through constant review can we hope to
make guarding our tongues a habit and save ourselves from severe transgressions.
Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.
The focus of this course will be the following areas of evil
- Loshon Horah
- Motzei Shem Rah
- Listening to the above
- Believing the above
- Any form of communication about a fellow Jew that is
derogatory, even if it does not cause him/her any harm.
- Any form of communication that causes any form of harm to
another Jew even if it’s not derogatory.
Motzei Shem Rah: Loshon Horah with falsehood mixed
Rechilus: Any form of communication that will bring hatred
or dislike upon a fellow Jew.
Listening: Hearing any of the above even if you
don’t accept it as truth.
Believing: Hearing any of the above and accepting it
One who is a participant in Loshon Horah or Rechilus can
violate up to:
17 negative transgressions
14 positive transgressions
Bring upon himself up to 4 curses
That is a grand total of 31 transgressions and 4 Curses. (A
person will not violate all of them with one incident of Loshon Horah, but over
time he is likely to transgress many of them.)
As you can see, Loshon Horah is a very heavy sin that
carries with it severe consequences. The goal of this course is to delineate
what forms of speech and communication are forbidden and what forms are
This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh. Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech. The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.
Menaseh: Yesterday, we raised the question as to why
Yaakov detoured to the Yeshiva of Shem and Aver instead of seeking a wife,
despite the fact that he was already 63 years old.
Oded: We compounded the question with the fact that
Yaakov knew that he was the one who was destined to beget the 12 shevatim. How
then did he delay such a monumental task?
Menaseh: Enlighten me!
Oded: Yaakov knew his uncle Lavan.
Menaseh: What did he know about him?
Oded: He knew that he was a conniving individual who
would not give his daughters hand in marriage with out demanding a large “gift”
in return. Yaakov lost all his possessions to Elifaz; he therefore knew that
the only “gift” he would be able to give Lavan was his labor. Additionally, he
knew that Lavan would want to destroy him as he indeed tried to do in the end.
He also knew that his uncle Lavan was an idol worshipper and his house was
filled with the impurity of idols.
Oded: Therefore, Yaakov felt that in order to
survive in the house of Lavan he must first fortify himself with Torah. He
spent 14 consecutive years toiling with tremendous diligence in Torah. Not
once did he lie down to sleep during those 14 years. With this fire power
behind him he was confident that he would be able to remain in the dangerous
and impure house of Lavan, even for a number of years, and leave unscathed.
If you have any
questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman clicking here.
If you know others
who would appreciate this program, please encourage them to join. The more
people participating, the greater the zechus! In addition, you will have a
share in the merit of anyone who improves their speech as a result of you
signing them onto this program!!
Sefer Chofetz Chaim – Introduction
Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Sha’ar HaTorah Chap. 9