Lesson 58c When teller includes himself – When teller doesn’t lie

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Lesson #58c

Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.



Loshon horah when
teller includes himself

  1. A co-worker told me about a misdeed that he and another
    co-worker committed.  May I believe him since he said it about himself as
  1. You may believe him about himself but not about the other
    fellow.  The fact that he also spoke about himself does not have any
    bearing on the loshon horah he spoke about the other fellow.


Believing loshon
horah when you hear it from someone who doesn’t lie

  1. I have a friend that I know never lies.  If he tells me loshon
    horah, may I believe him?
  1. In the times of the Gemora there where limited situations in
    which you were allowed to believe someone whom you trusted as 2
    witnesses.  However, nowadays, we don’t rely on this leniency, especially
    in light of the fact that it is extremely rare to find someone who meets
    all the criteria necessary to qualify for this status.  Therefore, even if
    you feel that the person who told you the loshon horah is very honest and
    even if he didn’t commit a sin by telling you this loshon horah, i.e. it
    was for a valid purpose, you still may not believe him.  Suspect yes,
    believe no.


This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh.   Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech.  The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.

Oded:  Rabbi Chaim Vital, the primary student of the
Arizal, echoes the words of the Zohar which we quoted yesterday in one brief

Menaseh:  What was his statement?

Oded:  When you mention bad things about your friend
your own sins will be told.

Menaseh:  It is clear that a person can really
destroy himself through speaking loshon horah.  But if remember correctly, the
Zohar you quoted yesterday seems to indicate that you not only harm yourself
but the entire world.

Oded:  You are absolutely correct!  Now ponder this
for a moment.  When one steals from his friend he can repair the damage by
returning the stolen item.  When one pains or embarrasses his friend he can
repair the damage by appeasing him and attaining his forgiveness.  However, one
who has accustomed himself to the sin of loshon horah has certainly aroused the
great prosecutor to prosecute against the entire world.  Who knows how many people
lost their possessions, or even their lives, as a result of the prosecution
unleashed though ones loshon horah.

Menaseh:  Can a person be held accountable for such
indirect results?

Oded:  In Bais din a person is not held accountable
for indirect damage he may have caused, but the Gemora in Meseches Bava Kama
teaches that in the heavenly courts he is held accountable.  Therefore, one who
cares about protecting his soul should be very very careful to guard against

If you have any
questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman clicking here.




1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 1 Chap. 7 Par. 6

2) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 6 Par. 7 Be’er Mayim Chaim


Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Section 2 Chap. 4

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