Lesson 54c Undoing the sin of believing loshon horah
Sponsored as a zechus for
Aharon ben Liba
May he have a speedy refuah shelaimah
Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.
How to undo the
sin of believing loshon horah
- What should I do if I already believed the loshon horah?
- You can undo the damage by following these 3 steps:
- Remove the belief from your heart. (You may suspect but
- Vidui (Verbally admit your sin)
- Accept upon yourself not to believe loshon horah in the
This is assuming that you only
believed the loshon horah but did not yet go and tell others. If you already told
others, you would need to appease the person whom you spoke about as well.
- If I believed loshon horah about someone, must I seek his
- If you were successful in removing the belief from your
heart, you have uprooted the damage (between man and his friend); therefore,
you do not need to seek his forgiveness. This is assuming that no damage
resulted to him on account of you believing the loshon horah. However, if
he was harmed as a result of you believing the loshon horah, for example,
you stopped doing business with him; then you would need to seek his
This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh. Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech. The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.
Oded: Our sages teach us in Meseches Sanhedrin that
Hashem asked Doaig: “Wicked one, when you get up to the Parshiyos that discuss
telling loshon horah, what will you extrapolate from them?”
Menaseh: Can you explain that question to me?
Oded: Doaig was a great Torah scholar but he was a
Baal Loshon Horah. He was the one who incited Shaul Hamelech against Dovid and
caused Nov the city of the Cohanim to be exterminated. When a person commits a
sin, by nature, he will feel embarrassment when he reaches the portion of Torah
that discusses his particular sin. Therefore, the Eliyahu Rabba writes that
one who is suspected of immoral relations shouldn’t be called up for the Torah
when we read the portion that deals with forbidden relations. In a similar
vein, when we get up to the parsha that speaks about a blind person or a
cripple they should not be called up to the Torah for that portion as well; so
as not to embarrass them. We just finished enumerating the many places that
the sin of loshon horah is referenced in the Torah. A person who frees himself
to speak freely, will certainly violate these transgressions many times over
the course of his life. Imagine the eternal embarrassment he will feel every
time these many portions of Torah are read.
Menaseh: Why do you say eternal? Won’t he be purged
from these sins in Gehinom?
Oded: You are correct; will be purged from these
sins, as the posuk in Amos states: “And he tells a person what he spoke”. Our
sages understand from this posuk that even a casual conversation that one had,
will be repeated to him at the time of judgment. The Vilna Gaon wrote in his
famous letter that for every forbidden speech, a person must go down very very
deep into Gehinom; the suffering he will experience for each speech is
inestimable. Even after he goes through all that suffering and is now receiving
his portion in Gan Eden for the mitzvos which he performed during his life time,
he will suffer tremendous embarrassment whenever he reaches the portions of
Torah that discuss loshon horah.
Menaseh: In Gan Eden he will be learning Torah?
Oded: Absolutely! Every Jew will bask In the light
of the Torah that he learned during his life time. However, this fellow who
engaged in loshon horah will be shamed every time he reaches a portion which
refers to the sin of loshon horah, which is quite often as we demonstrated. We
are not talking about a year or 2 of experiencing this shame but rather
eternity! The shame will be even greater than the shame he experiences in this
Oded: Because up above he will see how all the holy
angels hang on to every word of Hashem with fear and trepidation. However, he,
a small and lowly creation, carelessly abandoned the words of Hashem hundreds
and thousands of times. Happy will be the person that reflects on all this
during his life time. It will be good for him in this world and the next.
If you have any
questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman clicking here.
If you know others
who would appreciate this program, please encourage them to join. The more
people participating, the greater the zechus! In addition, you will have a
share in the merit of anyone who improves their speech as a result of you
signing them onto this program!!
1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 1 Chap. 6 Par. 12 Be’er Mayim
2) Implied from Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 1 Chap. 6 Par. 12 and
Be’er Mayim Chaim 33
Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Section 2 Chap. 3