Lesson 4c Non-verbal comunication – When including ones self
Dedicated l’illuy nishmas
Rebecca bas Yedida
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zechuyos being generated for the sake of our single brethren. Remember, by
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Lesson #8
Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.
Halachah
Criticizing a
drasha
#1
- I have a friend who is quite critical of our Rav’s
drashos. He often shares his thoughts with me. Is this a violation of
loshon horah?
- Of the worst kind. Let’s briefly examine the tremendous
harm your friend is causing by his slander. - If the Rav finds out (as is often the case) that people
are disparaging his drashos it can cause him tremendous embarrassment. - It can cause him to lose his job.
- He is causing a decrease in Avodas Hashem (serving
Hashem). The Rav’s words are generally designed to inspire people to
Avodas Hashem. Through his ridicule, he is causing the Rav’s words to be
ineffective. This is a very grave sin. - He is degrading a Talmid Chochom. This sin is so severe that
it results in the forfeiture of ones portion in the world to come.
His intentions are obviously
malicious. If he really cared, he would approach the Rav privately and offer
him constructive criticism on how to improve his drashos. It is absolutely
forbidden to listen to his words of ridicule. To the contrary, it is your
responsibility to rebuke him, for he is committing a very grave sin.
#2
- But didn’t we learn that the Torah doesn’t forbid loshon
horah about something that is already public knowledge? The Rav’s drashos
are delivered before many people.
- That principle does not apply here for a number of
reasons.
1. People have varying tastes and opinions. What doesn’t appeal to him
might be very appealing to others.
2. Generally, people who ridicule drashos tend to add their own
perspective and quite often embellish it with falsehoods. His spin on the
matter was certainly not public knowledge.
3. This leniency is not valid when the teller flavors the incident in
order to disparage someone.
Aggadah
This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh. Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech. The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.
Oded: As we mentioned yesterday, we are commanded to
remember what Hashem did to Miriam.
Menaseh: You were going to explain the posuk that
people recite daily in order to remember what Hashem did to Miriam so that I may
take the words to heart and not just recite them.
Oded: Okay, let’s begin. The posuk states as
follows: “Remember what Hashem your G-d did to Miriam on the way when you left Egypt”. The posuk is informing us of 4 things which we need to direct our attention to.
They are:
1. What (What did Hashem do)
2. Who (To whom did he do it)
3. Where (Where did Hashem do this)
4. When (When was it done)
Menaseh: What, is Tzoras, to who, is to Miriam,
where, is on the way, and when, is when we left Egypt.
Oded: That’s correct!
Menaseh: I’m not sure that I understand your point.
Oded: If we analyze each aspect, individually, we
will have a new appreciation of how severe loshon horah is in the eyes of
Hashem.
Menaseh: Okay.
Oded: Let’s start with the “what”. Tzoras is a very
severe infliction for the following reasons:
1. There is no way to be cured from it without divine intervention.
2. The impurity of tzoras is so severe that a person who has it must sit
outside of all 3 camps (in other words, away from civilization).
3. If you come under the same roof as a person with tzoras, you become
impure.
4. A person who has tzoras is considered as if he/she is dead.
Menaseh: Is tzoras more severe than other
impurities?
Oded: Yes. Tzoras is the only impurity that
requires leaving all 3 camps. Additionally, most other impurities do not
contaminate those that are under the same roof (aside from the impurity of a
dead body).
Menaseh: I certainly now have a greater appreciation
of the severity of tzoras.
Oded: Good! We will continue with our analysis
tomorrow.
If you have any
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Sources
Halachah
1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 1 Chap. 2 Par.
12
2) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 1 Chap. 2 Be’er Mayim
Chaim 25
Agaddah
Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Sha’ar Hatevunah Chap. 12