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have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.
How to respond
when asked about potential partner who is financially unstable
- You mentioned previously that if my friend wants to
partner up with someone who is financially unstable, I may not take the
initiative and discourage him from doing so. My friend is actually seeking
my opinion about this potential partnership. How should I advise him?
- As we previously mentioned, you may not take the
initiative and discourage your friend from taking this fellow on as
partner, since the fact that he is not financially stable does not
necessarily indicate that he can’t be a good partner. However, if he is
seeking your advice and you yourself would not take this fellow as a
partner due to his lack of financial stability, you may not advise your
friend to do so either. When giving advice, you may only advise what in
your opinion is in the best interest of the one who is seeking your
initiative to inform about shortcoming of a shidduch
- My friend wants to get engaged to a fellow who I know has
certain shortcomings that my friend is unaware of. May I tell her?
- It really depends on the nature of the shortcomings. There
are many factors that must be carefully weighed before doing so. We will
discuss them in detail in upcoming lessons.
This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh. Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech. The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.
Menaseh: You mentioned the other day that one who
doesn’t study Torah cannot perform the mitzvos properly. Can you provide me with
Oded: Sure! Let’s take the mitzvah of Tefillin.
Will he know to make sure that the boxes are perfectly square or that the
straps are all black? Does he know that the entire Tefillin must be resting on
his head and not his forehead or the exact position of the Tefillin on the
arm? These are all matters that were given over to Moshe Rabainu orally and
are commonly neglected by people who are ignorant of Torah.
Menaseh: I see. Do you have another example?
Oded: We are obligated to recite Shema twice daily.
Does he know how to properly accept upon himself the yoke of heaven? Does he
make sure to hear the words that he is reciting or is careful to properly
pronounce the words as delineated by the Gemora and Shulchan aruch? Is he
careful to recite the Shema in its proper time both in the winter and summer?
These are mitzvos that are performed daily. If he does not know to be careful
with these mitzvos, he will certainly not know to be careful in the less
commonly practiced mitzvos.
Gmar Chasima Tova!
If you have any
questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman by
hitting the reply button.
If you know others
who would appreciate this program, please encourage them to join. The more
people participating, the greater the zechus! In addition, you will have a
share in the merit of anyone who improves their speech as a result of you
signing them onto this program!!
1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 9,
second illustration, Par. 3
2) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 9, second
illustration, Par. 4
Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Sha’ar HaTorah Chap. 7