Lesson 109

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Lesson #109

Please verbalize or
have in mind that you are studying this material as a merit for a specific
single and/or Jewish singles throughout the world.


Condition #4


  1. In condition number four, (See appendix below) you stated that
    if you can bring about the benefit some other way without telling
    rechilus, then it is forbidden to tell the rechilus.  There is a storeowner
    that I know who is consistently deceitful.  I can prevent my friend from
    shopping in his store without saying rechilus.  However, if I reveal the
    reason it might prevent others as well from shopping there and getting
    filched.  Is that a valid reason to tell him the rechilus?
  1. Yes.  If the storeowner is consistently deceitful, you may
    tell your friend, even though you can prevent him from shopping there in
    some other way; since by getting the word out you can save others from
    being filched.  However, if you only know of one incident where the storeowner
    was deceptive; you may not tell the rechilus if there is another way of
    bringing about the benefit.


  1. If my friend already purchased the product and was over
    charged, may I inform him that he paid too much?
  1. If he has no recourse then you may not inform him;
    especially if he might take matters into his own hands and do something
    that is halachicly wrong.  If he does have a halachicly valid recourse then
    you may tell him.


This section is
formatted as a conversation between Oded and Menaseh.   Oded is encouraging his
friend Menaseh to be more careful in guarding his tongue from evil speech.  The
thoughts in this section are primarily based on the sefer, Shmiras Haloshon.

Menaseh:  you mentioned yesterday that you were going
to expound on how a son who learns Torah can save his father from judgment in

Oded:  The Medrash relates the following story.  Rav Zemira’ah
was walking in a field when he noticed flames emerging out of cracks in the Mountains
of Ararat.  He bent his ear to hear and heard voices.  An Arab, who noticed him
listening, said to him: “Come with me and I will show you wonders hidden from
man”.  He took him behind a rock where he saw other cracks from which flames
were emerging.  The Arab said to him: “Bend your ear here and listen”.  He bent
his ear and heard voices saying “vay vay…”.  Rav Zemira’ah exclaimed: “This is
certainly one of the locations of Gehinom”.  The Arab continued on his way and
Rav Zemira’ah was left on his own.  He moved on to another location and peering
through a crack and saw a person who was screaming loudly, being hauled in
deeper, down to another level.  After that Rav Zemira’ah was no longer able to see
as they vanished from sight.  I will share with you the rest of the story the
next time we speak.

We wish all our readers a great new year!!!


1.      Don’t be hasty in arriving at a decision about the nature of the person
or situation but rather deliberate carefully.

2.      Do not exaggerate the matter.

3.      Your intentions should be solely to help the individual whom you are
advising and not out of hatred for the other party.

If you can bring
about the benefit some other way, without telling rechilus, then it is
forbidden to tell the rechilus.

Your words may not cause him more harm than is
due to him in Bais Din.

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questions regarding these lessons, feel free to contact Rabbi Faivel Adelman by
hitting the reply button.


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1) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 9
footnote to Be’er Mayim Chaim 28 

2) Sefer Chofetz Chaim Sec. 2 Chap. 9 Par. 11


Sefer Shmiras Haloshon Sha’ar HaTorah Chap. 7

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